Whenever I am down, I somehow feel so much stronger. What is there to lose when you are about to lose it all? It is only when you are at the top that you fear losing everything. I have to admit that this is a loser's belief. Still, who said anything about winners winning at the end of the day? Don't we all die at the end of the day? Gratifying thought.

I often wonder why I am so idealistic. I thought about it at work today and it finally dawned upon me that it is a natural instinct to be idealistc. Sometimes, we just have the ability to put a balance in life. When you feel empty in some parts of your life, you try to make another part of your life more fufiling. This innate ability somehow clashes with the need for idealism to exist. The world is too complicated and it is so much easier to just sort everything into two groups. Black or white, right or wrong. It is an instinct. I know I have to do that to make life easier but yet, more often than not, I can't. Perhaps I see too much things. When you are too objective, you tend to have diverse thoughts. Perhaps that is why people who are objective often get torn apart by logical conflicting thoughts. and logical conflicting thought is not even an oxymoron. It is clear-cut, yet complex. If I can place a picture to that, it is probably a number of straight lines crossing and overlapping haphazardly.

Sometimes, questions answer you more than answers do. It is only when you understand through your own questions then can you gain another level of understanding. I f you understand through answers that others provide, you will get to the next level of others understanding. At the end of the day, which do you want more? Yours or others?

When they say life is about experiencing the process, they were not kidding.