Why is 'good' always the immediate response when someone asks how my day was, even when I don't feel good? The only difference lies in the variations of my tone. Perhaps that is about all I am willing to share with people or perhaps that is the only answer they want to hear. "Good? Nice to hear that. Bye bye."

There are times when someone asks a question or makes a comment and I just remain silent and smile. Not may knew, but I actually answered everything they say confidently, inwardly. I have no idea why sometimes, the words just refused to come out. Perhaps I am too afraid to be judged, too conscious of everyone around me. I have this sudden flash words 'Your opinion counts' in front of me. That is the most popular mantra that feedback forms stubbornly stick by. I have to stop my subconscious mind from picking up negative things. Otherwise, very soon, my brain would be taken over by the subconscious mind, that is if I have a brain.

Life has been a little not balanced recently. I can't really control it that well anymore. Perhaps, the control is not so muc in me. Sometimes, I wish I can get drunk and rant and rave, and dance without restraint, or even swim naked in public. Of course, I can, but I wish I allow myself to. Say something really dumb and laugh at it instead of feeling stupid, sleep for 2 consecutive days without swollen eyes (without the help of a baseball bat), laugh heartily like a hyenna into people's face and skip away leaving them stunned, dance all the way to work from TPY mrt station to work ... ...

Maybe I will just add them to my To-do List at work.

The past few days went by like a breeze. Not so much on the easy bit, rather the speed. I wouldn't say it is refreshing. It is more like a short, rude awakening that the happy time is over. There were so many departures and fr a moment, I felt like I was back to Day 1 in my company. This made me think a little on how I would cope when I get to the company next on the list God charted for me. The people that I would be meeting, the paths of those that would cross with mine... Life is sometimes so wonderfully miraculous.

I met up with many friends. Food at Ritz Carlton was good though I still prefer Rose Veranda. There were the 2 French movies that I caught that still have the burning effect on me, the very nice steam bath, shopping and great music at St James... Still, it feels like something is missing in my life. I can't exactly pin-point what it is. I guess it could be a mixture of anticipation on how life could turn out to be if I were to move in a different direction. The mice in the story of Pied Piper were all dead because they followed Pied Piper's music and move with the crowd. I want to hear a different tune, sing a different one. I am still figuring how, but I am ndeed cooking up something. For now, it is just not ready to be served. Yet.

That aside, the next big event on top of my convocation on 31 August 2007 is Foodie's birthday. People, you have no idea how hard I am saving and how well-behaved I was when I was shopping with Foodie. Haha... My people miss Foodie's pics..

Retro Foodie Flo

I have been searching for sometime and apparently, this is the only recent photo of Foodie thatI can find and post because this is the only one where she is sober from alcohol. There you go, at least I kept the photo and video for personal viewing.

Have a nice long weekend people.